Couch Report Writer’s Super Bowl Predictions

Welcome to the first annual Couch Report Super Bowl Predictions Article. Here, you will see all of our awesome writers predictions and who we’ve got as the Super Bowl winner!Follow @couchreport on Instagram for all of the football content you need? DM us if you would like to join our team!

Image result for tom brady holding trophy


Super Bowl LIV: Pats vs Cowboys

Score: Pats 44 Cowboys 27

Image result for bill belichick

It’s America worst nightmare. Perhaps the two most hated teams in all of sports clash on the biggest stage. Fans are conflicted, as they can’t decide whether to root for Brady and Belichick to lose, or for Jerry Jones and the Cowboys to lose. In the end, Dak attack won’t be able to keep up with Mr. Big Chest and Tom Brady, as the Pats score every drive en route to ring #7.

OG McWild

Super Bowl LIV: Chiefs vs Falcons

Score: Chiefs 35, Falcons 31

Image result for patrick mahomes

The Kansas City Chiefs with their band of child-beating and woman-kicking criminals defeat the noble Falcons who still can’t overcome the pain of their loss to New England in Super Bowl LI. 
The offensive firepower of the Chiefs is simply too much for the Falcons to overcome as they fall again on the game’s greatest stage. 
The Chiefs are happy because they somehow beat the greatest team ever assembled, the New England Patriots, due to a coach’s challenge on a pass interference call that changed the outcome of the game. 
This leads to a league-wide outcry against reviewing pass interference penalties and proves once again how bad of a commissioner Roger Goodell really is. 


Super Bowl LIV: Saints vs. Patriots

Score: Saints 28, Patriots 24

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Brees. Brady. A matchup the country has waited to see forever. We were robbed of this matchup last year, but this year the refs will make sure lightning won’t strike twice. Although New England lost star TE Rob Gronkowski to retirement, The Pats still have Brady and Belichick, which means they have a strong hold on the AFC. Drew Brees still boasts young playmakers like Alvin Kamara, Michael Thomas and Marshon Lattimore. The NFC South is pretty much the Saints’ to lose. Drew Brees had a great season last year and was a wrongful pass interference call away from playing Brady in Super Bowl XLIII. With both future Hall of Famers in their 40s, this will more than likely the last try for this matchup. In the end, Drew Brees will lead the Saints down the field on a game winning drive and into the sunset.


Super Bowl LIV: Chiefs vs Vikings

Score: Chiefs 20, Vikings 13

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All this Patriots – Saints or Chiefs – Saints talk is exhausting! Assuming teams stay the same is just foolish given the extreme turnover in football.

I’m going with a team that has not played in a Super Bowl since The Godfather came out in theaters against a team that has yet to win a Super Bowl despite playing in four of them. Minnesota has an historic defense on their hands and they just need to get past Kirk Cousins in order to escape the NFC. The Ravens won a title with Joe Flacco, the Vikings can win an NFC championship with Kirk Cousins. Man what a backhanded compliment. As for KC, the Chiefs will be the first wild card team to make the Bowl since the Packers in 2010. I believe their defense will hurt them in the regular season but Mahomes and that eccentric offense will upset the Jaguars, Patriots and Steelers en route to the big game. Mahomes obviously out duels Cousins, who also makes some costly mistakes as Big Red wins it’s first Super Bowl title.


Super Bowl LIV: Pats vs Eagles

Pats 34 Eagles 27

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With the balance of the NFL constantly shifting, the two best NFL teams for their conference are ones that have been there before and, in fact have even played each other as recently as 2017. Starting with the AFC, I have the New England Patriots. The offense is revolving around what looks to be a revolutionary passing game while the defense looks to have another brilliant year behind defensive mastermind Bill Belichick. The Chiefs are another possibility, but the genius of Brady and co. will be too much. However, the race for the NFC crown looks a lot more wide open. Despite threats in teams such as the Saints and Rams, my pick for the NFC is the Eagles. Philly is about as complete of a team as they come. Their passing games looks amazing, they have arguably the best offensive line in the NFL, their defensive line is spectacular, their safeties are at a high level, having Doug Pederson as your HC is a privilege, and the team has experience playing together.

If these these two teams do end up clashing in the Super Bowl, the war will be decided in a multitude of  battles. The matchup between both lines is very close but the eagles do ultimately look a little better off. However, Belichick can never be counted out on defense, and I do expect the Patriots to surrender less points than the last time these two teams played in the Super Bowl. As for the skill positions, the Patriots easily win both passing game battles, with their secondary being one of the league’s best while their passing game is a star studded group led by Brady. New England also has a versatile ground game, that should perform well against arguably the Eagles biggest weakness, their linebackers. It should definitely be a very close matchup, but nonetheless, I have the favorite Patriots winning the Super Bowl 34-27


Super Bowl LIV: Pats vs Saints

Score: Pats 21 Saints 17

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My SB pick is the New England Patriots and the New Orleans Saints. NE looks like a lock despite how good KC is. As for New Orleans, nobody looked too good in their Week 1 game, and the NFC is very wide open. That being said, the Saints are very talented with great coaching, and I think they’ll avenge the loss from last year. NE should beat NO with a score of around 21-17 in a game dictated by defensive plays.


Super Bowl LIV: Pats vs Eagles

Score: Pats 25 Eagles 31

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The Eagles are the most complete team in football. They boast a top 3 OL, DL, TE room, and excellent coaching, as well as some of the most balanced and deep arsenals of offensive weapons. The back 7 isn’t anything to brag about, but as long as they arent devastated by injuries like like year, they won’t be a liability. As always however, the question is the health of Carson Wentz. If he is out going into the playoffs, then of course the Eagles will be a long shot, however, I like to do my predictions without any kind of injury explanations. I recognize that it is a risk, but I don’t like predicting injuries because doing so usually leads to being wrong. It is worth mentioning that even if Josh McCown ends up leading them into the playoffs, I would not be all that shocked if this team went on a run, solely because of all the surrounding pieces. 

Onto the Patriots side. They’re a near lock for the AFC Championship and given the way I expect the season to play out, it should be taking place in Foxboro. There’s a lot of uncertainty throughout this team in terms of the process, but the result should he the same. From the pass catchers to the offensive line, the roles of many players aren’t locked in, but as long as the Brady-Belichick combo is there, the surrounding pieces will fall into place and the production will come. The secondary isn’t too flashy, but is very solid all across and in my eyes could be considered the “bend, don’t break” archetype, executed perfectly. This running game will be dominant and will be the backbone of this team. That’s not to say Brady won’t be able to step up when needed, but more to highlight the focus they’ll put on rushing the ball. Matchup wise, I think the Eagles dominant defensive line will prevent the Patriots from playing the ground and pound style they’d like. This will lead the Brady having another great statistical passing performance like 2 years ago. The difference on the other side though, is that Philly’s running game will be very effective and when combined with their excellent passing game and great playcalling, I see the Eagles pulling out the win.


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